3 months since surgery or there abouts and I am released to return to work. THANK GOODNESS! I was ready. The working out everyday at the pool was wonderful but I missed my kids. I missed my coworkers. I missed my routine. I missed normal.
I headed back to work on Valentine's Week...first week back and I have to throw a party....what kind of planning was that? I'm still in my brace. I'm still gimpy. and I have to teach 27 smiling faces...yes I got a new student on my first day back... and it's valentine's week... What on earth am I going to do? I taught. I enjoyed myself. I wore sweatpants and tennis shoes. My students were beyond estatic to have me back. I was beyond estactic to be back.
The new normal....or the current normal. I couldn't teach all morning without a bathroom break. I have no breaks in my schedule. Solved that problem by recruiting help. (I had to ask for help...and everyone has been glad to help!) I couldn't bend over to a student's desk....so I sat at a desk and they came to me. I walk slower than normal...they have to pace to my speed. All these things and many more slowly figured themselves out as we got used to the new normal. I picked up two reams of copy paper and freaked people out...2 reams, 1000 sheets of paper....remember that sense of independence... definitely trampled on by my well-meaning colleagues. but I smiled and said thank you. I had to leave early for PT....I had to ask for help in covering my room for 7 minutes. Again, everyone was more than happy to help. I'm still learning how to be independent without hurting other's feelings or thoughts! My students checked everyday to make sure I had my brace on. Multiple times a day. They picked up everything I dropped. They brought me things from around the room. They listened even when I was teaching from a chair or stool instead of walking around the room. They listened when I couldn't sit on the floor with them. They adjusted to the new normal much faster than anyone else around and that included me.
I was so happy to be back at school. Back at work. Everyone noticed the permagrin. My PT's 1st comment at my first appt after going back...you needed your routine back. I just grinned and worked my ass off in PT. But things weren't the same. I still was living at my parents house...leaving at 730am and getting home at 9-10pm. I still needed help in doing many things. I wasn't back to my normal workout schedule. (Can you tell I am a routine based person? Don't screw with my routine...I don't adjust well!) People looked at me differently...are you ok, how are you feeling, how's your back, you're limping. So many questions about the physical changes...very little concern or interest in the mental aspect of my life. Those that I spent the most time with were the ones that were there the least... how much energy have I put into relationships that weren't returned?
And I'm still at my parents house. Having to tell them when I'd be home or not be home. What my day was going to be like. Mom had to get up with me every day... was she worried I'd skip a day of work? Was she worried I'd be late? I do think they forgot I am an adult and responsible for myself. And there's lots of snow. The return to my apartment seems to be stretching farther and farther away.
My days were 10-12 hour days. I loved it! I crashed hard on weekends. I was trying to find balance between work, healing, social life, and working out. I wanted to spend endless hours in MY classroom. I wanted to spend hours in the pool. I wanted to spend hours with my friends. I wanted everything and I wanted it to be now. Needless to say...I'm not a highly patient person and I tend to push my limits. I crashed really hard on weekends. I wasn't very active and took my rest days on the weekends....can you say bad idea? If I took a rest day from the pool on the weekend, I wasn't getting my normal walking in at school... see the pattern? So by the time Monday rolled around I was stiff and sore from not moving much over the weekend.... So new normal means I can't take a day and do nothing...so rest days occurred during the week and I made sure to head to the pool on weekends. All of a sudden, monday's weren't the worst day ever :)
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